"I like orange, I like orange, I like orange!"

We had a lovely little tea party under the shady trees. Our spread included some rice, lentils and beans. The girls had a ball scooping and pouring their little mixtures from one cup to the next.

"Toddlers learn through play." We hear that phrase all the time, but what does it actually mean? Is play only about learning colours, numbers and letters, or are children learning something bigger?

We have been introducing autonomy and freedom of choice over the past few months. We also use it as a discipline technique, but more on that later... Our basic narrative is that you are important enough to make some choices for yourself.

Fast forward to outside play time: Amanda has set up a beautiful tea party for the girls under the tree. They each have a teacup, a spoon, and a saucer. These are filled with beans, lentils and rice for the girls to scoop and pour to heart's content. Darling Lion has always been our more expressive tot and is VERY vocal about her likes and dislikes. She often explains (rather loudly) that she really really likes orange. Okay, Lion. We get it.

During outside play time, the girls sit down for their pretend tea party. They start dishing up their spread of beans, rice and lentils. Suddenly, Elephant exclaims: "Oh no! Lion likes orange. Lion have the orange cup! Elephant is Lion's friend.", and pours the contents of the orange cup she has been playing with over into a different cup before handing it over to Lion. My heart... She was clearly taking Lion's preference into account - with no specific request from her friend. She internalised every single lesson about what a healthy friendship looks like. While playing.

Nobody instructed Elephant to give Lion the orange cup. There was no worksheet, no reward sticker and no adult reminding her to "be kind". She simply remembered what mattered to someone she cared about - and acted on it. That is why we protect play at Tannie Net's Daycare. Children aren't just learning colours and counting. They're learning to notice other people. They're learning empathy. They're learning friendship.

And sometimes, they're learning it with nothing more than a handful of beans and an orange teacup.